First, I should tell you that while I was reading the article that I found about marriage in Tonga, I was able to practice keeping an open mind about their culture and not using my frame of reference to describe it. For example, in Tonga, it's not uncommon for a father to be supportive of young men making sexual innuendos or talking about her in a sexual way in front of the father. He actually supports it and is proud that his daughther is desirable. I had never really heard anything like that before, and it really made me think about how different that culture is compared to what I know. But that doesn't make it wrong, just because it's not what I do or what I would encourage (or allow!) my husband to do. There were many examples like that in the article I read about marriage.
I was really interested to find out how many people elope instead of having ceremonial weddings first.
I also read an article about relationships in the Tongan community. I thought it was interesting the way people interacted and how guys talked about girls. I however did not practice keeping an open mind. I have been trying but always forget and find myself saying things are weird when they are just different. I think you made a very good point when you said that just because it's not what we do or what we would encourage it doesn't make it wrong. Way to be Allyson! :)
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