Learning Journal 19

We talked on Wednesday about how we will be perceived when we enter the community and how to show reciprocity.  We were asked what we would do when get dropped off at the host family's house and how we would introduce ourselves.  I think the automatic response is to say, "Hi, I'm Allyson! I'm from the U.S., specifically a small town in KY.  I am a student at BYU and came down here to do research on the family."  But, after our lesson on Wednesday I thought about how important it is to not only introduce ourselves, but to introduce ourselves by asking questions about them or making observations about things they are doing, i.e., "that pig you're cutting open looks like it will be really tasty", or "I like your chicken!"  But seriously, I think by asking questions about them or expressing interest in their lives and cultures, they will get to know us at the same time.  And by learning about them from the beginning, I think that will help them to understand that we are there to learn from them and not there to teach them, or fix them like the article last week talked about.

The lesson also made me think about how I want to bring a little scrapbook or photo album with me.  My friend went to Peru last year and she said one of the best conversation starters/relationship builders was sharing things about her life with the kids she taught.  They loved seeing her family, and pets, and friends.  She said all of the little girls loved looking at her friends and all of our prom dresses.  I think by sharing things about our lives, that will make them more comfortable to share things about their lives with us.

One last thought I had came from our culture class.  Sione was talking about how a lot of Tongans think of the "Palangi" or white people way as being superior to the Tongan way.   For some reason this made me so sad, because even though I have a lot of pride in my culture and this country, I definitely would not consider it at all superior or better than the Tongan way, or just about any other culture for that matter.  It made me think about how I'll deal with people who think like that or treat me like I'm superior to them, because I'm a palangi.  I know we aren't supposed to try to change anything about their culture, or try to be the "mother teresa" or whatever, but I know I want to make an effort to show that I really believe there is a lot of beauty in their culture.  I don't think this will change the way they view the Palangi culture, but I think it will make me feel better if nothing else.  I'd like to make an effort to show them there are many things in their culture that I admire and even find superior to the "American way."  It's funny, because one of the most annoying things to me about my culture is that a lot of us think that our culture is the best and everyone else should want to be like us.  So it's ironic that the one of the saddest things about the Tongan culture, to me, is that some of them might think our way is a better way.